Saturday 25 September 2010

New Dog Breeds

The American Kennel Club has decided to recognize these new breeds of dogs that are the result of cross breeding:

Collie x Lhaso Apso:
Collapso a dog that folds up for easy transport.

Spitz x Chow Chow:
Spitz-Chow a dog that throws up a lot.

Bloodhound x Borzoi:
Bloody Bore, a dog that's not much fun.

Pointer x Setter:
Poinsetter a traditional Christmas pet.

Kerry Blue x Terrier Skye Terrier:
Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries.

Pekingese x Lhaso Apso:
Peekasso, an abstract dog.

Labrador Retriever x Curly Coated Retriever:
Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists.

Newfoundland x Basset Hound:
Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisers.

Terrier x Bulldog:
Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes.

Bloodhound x Labrador:
Blabrador, a dog that barks incessantly.

Malamute x Pointer:
Moot Point, owned by...oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway.

Collie x Malamute:
Commute, a dog that travels to work.

Deerhound x Terrier:
Derriere, a dog that's true to the end.

Poodle x Min Pincher:
PooPin, a dog for constipated people.

Monday 20 September 2010

Chill Out Cat's

They may be ill and/or abandoned but can see no reason not to relax and take advantage of the amenities. Food, a warm bed and whatever else they can get.

I got a bed, heat pad, food water. I managed to remove that annoying catheter from my leg. Now quit disturbing me human.


No mum but not worried food still on tap and it is snuggly.



Look human l am not going back in there now go away and let me eat in peace.


I will just wait here for the next snack to arrive zzzzzzzzzz..........


Me n Teddy going to take on the world, he is my new friend since l was abandoned.

Saturday 18 September 2010

Life After Brian

Well the saga of “Life after Brian” continues, except for me he is still here. Things happen all the time. When l need help it appears, when l am down something happens to cheer me up. Going often as we used too to the spiritualist org. helped with my beliefs and the fact l am a sort of clairvoyant. That means not good but do see the odd spirit.

I am having major problems with clydesdale bank trying to refuse to take the camper back they just want the money. However the paperwork says lease purchase all over it and the lawyer who checked it said do NOT sell it or you will be committing theft.
So result is the camper has been placed in storage, dvla informed, insurance removed, barclays (clydesdale) informed. When l get the next letter back from them then the financial ombudsman will step in to deal with it, they said to wait for the 3rd letter.

Mint have been sending Brian loads of threatening letters. I have been dealing with estates who have been fine it is the other dept. who are idiots. I tried ringing and sending letters no luck. Estates tried to help ditto on no luck. I just kept getting threats 6 over a 2 week period in one instance and constant individual ones.
So l sent them to the financial ombudsman l think they actioned it as l have received a letter from idiot dept letter writer asking for a death cert. My reply has been sorted and is not to polite.
Pity l was looking for a court case. I was going to walk in and plop 3 bags of ash in front of the judge and say “Meet Brian, l don’t suppose you mind if l speak up for him as Mint insisted that they sue him”.
At the same time the national press who l dislike (to put it mildly) after their harassment when Brian passed and so much crud they printed and print would have been sent invites to get some lovely quotes and photos. I may dislike them but they have a use at times.

Work is busy and everyone has been very good. I have trouble saying no when asked to help. It isn’t something that has happened since Brian passed as some folks think l have always worked like this. I do need to slow down though.

The other night l held my first animal to be put to sleep with an owner present there was no one else about. It was not me who asked not to hold l think the vets decided between themselves. It was very stressful as the lad and his dad were hysterical but l held it together and as soon as l could left the room. I spent a few minutes in a side room to compose myself.

I want to set the parachute centre to wildflowers. This idea hit me the first time l went down to the centre after the accident. There is
a wildflower farma couple of fields over from Langar and they have been marvellous helping and advising. It must be the name of the owner he is also Brian.
If you are in the area worth a visit come spring/summer when the flower fields are in bloom. What are pulled out from gardens as weeds look amazing when seen in huge fields of multicolour drifts waving in the breeze. There is a yummy cake and snack bar, a kids play area and woods walk to dragonfly ponds and plenty of plants, seeds for all areas and types (bees, butterfly woods, ponds, hedgerows, fields etc) and advice

The middle of the DZ was harder than even my wildest nightmare. It is cut for hayledge so l needed animal friendly plants. Cornfield annuals went in here but what a job.
The ground is thick clay and was wet. I had thought pull up grass and plant, no chance. I had to dig out wedges that ended up being about 1ft deep, haul it out, turn it upside down and put it back then jump up and down to flatten it back. Grab the shovel and hack at the clay to loosen it so l could seed it.
This brilliant set of manoeuvres started on what could not be described as the best of days. There was a howling gale blowing, all the jumpers sat sensibly inside in the warmth, those that came down that is.
As it is an airfield the only thing to break the gale force winds is the body that it hits, in this case mine.
Then to add to this there was a heavy rain falling well actually it was travelling horizontally not falling vertically so that made it even more fun. A shower and blow dry in a freezer.
Day 2 was better but l was to exhausted from the day before to do more than 6 “holes” instead l re hacked the day before top soil efforts and reseeded.

After the dz in the morning l spent the afternoon doing the peri track. A long 3.5mile walk on the perimeter of the airfield with long season meadow mix which will flower from spring until autumn. This meant walking along with a rake and clearing patches of ground and sprinkling seeds. Very easy and enjoyable compared to the DZ

However that is all the seeds going in for this year. I won’t get down there again in seed planting season which has now ended and l want to see how it comes out in the new year and will design better from there.

I have planted a wayfarer shrub It has bright red and some black berries, very shiny and shades of pink berries to get to the red colour. The flowers are bright white and in autumn the leaves fade to pretty shades of red/pink.
This is behind the hanger, l will plant a couple more bushes there when l decide what, I have till January for them though so no rush.

I took my will and Advanced Directive (Living will) to the solicitor the other day.
Pen to pad “So this goes to him and here to sort that and if that goes to that then what have you done with the rest of it”?
“There” l pointed out to him.
He did that over the glasses look and harrumphed at me. Then asked more questions which l got us totally confused over with the answer but we got part one the complicated part sorted.
In my defence when l gave it to him l did say part 1 was complicated and needed sorting.
Him after a bit "You expecting lots of people to die or do you enjoy complicating things"?
Me "If A dies B is in B dies C... err ok just trying to cover things, it seemed simple"
Solicitor looks over glasses grins and harrumphs again
Him reading after reading bit more "Lots of items"?
I mumbled "When did you last look at your stuff”?
My solicitor has very expressive eyebrows and thinks l am overcautious.

Advanced Directive (living will) He said well lets work on you being unconscious or unable to communicate l think you will have no trouble otherwise, eyebrows waggled again.
Now l am guessing he thinks l am not worried about speaking out but l could be wrong.
“You can’t tell the judge that”.
Me “I am not l am saying that’s what l want done when he finds in my favour” Eyebrows exercised and a big sigh. Ok we will leave that in.
“No you defiantly can not say that”!!
“Well it was only if that happened” pointing at a sentence
We reword that sentence then law is a series of precedence and that isn’t one.
“Well a precedence has to be set and l was just asking for one to be set..”
Scribbled through with pen and eyebrows in overdrive it was made clear that it wouldn’t be set on his watch.

So life moves on slowly, mostly good days with bad moments sprinkled in like currants in a cake. I have amazing friends old and new. They are there to help pull me up with either a helping hand or a boot up the backside whichever is needed.